Micah Mabe: The Struggle

Posted by in Brotherhood,Temptation | November 14, 2012

Editor’s Note: Micah is our first brother to write on a topic many of us have struggled with: Pornography. He talks plainly about the lies and temptation, the silent killer, that comes in the night to steal and destroy. Thanks to Micah for his honesty and the integrity he pursues as a man after God’s own heart.

The next morning I woke up on a couch confused as to where I was. After a few minutes I recognized my friend’s basement where I had passed out the night before. My friends eventually showed up to make sure I was alright, but something was different about their expressions. I asked them what was wrong; and what they showed me on their phones and the report from the night before left me shocked, embarrassed, and numb. The videos showed me doing things I would never think of doing. And they informed me that one of the guys that spent the night stole the keys to my Dad’s car, got pulled over for a DUI, and that the car was impounded. Days later, I was in the police office being interrogated and was asked to recall what happened the night before. I didn’t even know where to begin because I drank so much alcohol that I passed out and didn’t remember anything. As I took it all in, I found myself looking at my Junior year in high school and asked myself, “How did this happen? Who am I?”

I grew up in a Christian home, was a member of Perimeter Church, and went to Perimeter Christian School until eighth grade. I attended Wesleyan School until my Junior year and spent the last two years in public school. I led a small group for a church retreat, mentored younger friends, and was a leader on my baseball team. I was living the dream, yet I longed to be free. Because on the outside I had everything together, but on the inside I was running in every direction trying to satisfy the need and pressure to please others and myself.

It started early my seventh grade year with pornography. As a seventh grader who was raised in a sheltered, Christian environment, sex was just an education…

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Barry Sutlive: The Author

Posted by in Faith | November 5, 2012

Editor’s Note: Barry has been a stalwart for our ministry for many years. A strong-willed young man, he has always stirred the best in the people around him and demanded a lot of himself. As a fellow disciple, brother, and friend, I’m happy to share some of Barry’s encouraging words on the importance of rest and our recognition of the author behind every one of our stories.

The mysterious grandeur surrounding college won’t go away until the day your parents drive off and you realize this is it. Life is a book and, as humans, we are always trying to get to the next chapter. The only thing keeping us from skipping to the end is the time that it takes us to read the pages. In middle school, one will always desire to walk alongside those in high school; and the only thing a senior in high school has on his mind is college; and each time we perceive that the next chapter will be better. But all to often we find ourselves turning back the pages to where we once were.

In each chapter of our lives as we attempt to plot our own destiny, we frequently forget that our story has already been written. When reading, many times one might find oneself skipping over sections deemed boring and unnecessary, forgetting the entire time that the author placed those parts there for a reason. If one could title the chapter of one’s life story regarding college, it would sound something like The Never Ending Sleepover. We all remember those rare hallowed Friday nights in which all your buddies would gather together for the sleepover. Generally, there was a division into about 5 or so groups during these nights. You had the kids who stayed up all night, the ones who played videogames till the break of dawn, those who just ran around seeking mischief, the uncomfortable kid in the corner, the binge candy eaters, and finally you had the one who always sought sleep. The same generalities exist in college today; mischief is sought and, “candy” binges carry on 24/7. But the question to ask is, when is it time to take a moment and separate yourself from the crowd and just rest.

More often than not I find myself veering away from rest. Rest can come in many forms; sleep is the most obvious, but others include moments of solitude and time spent in prayer. All too often, I find myself glancing over sections that I classify as unnecessary and time consuming when in fact, these are the parts that the author knows I need the most. The author of your story has written a best seller or two and knows what’s important and what isn’t. To leave you with one piece of advice, read the whole story. You might end up glancing over the part about the binge “candy” eating next time. And remember to thank your author because his story ended with the ultimate sacrifice for every book he has ever written.

Barry Sutlive

Spotlight: Radical Mentoring

Posted by in Resources | October 29, 2012

Editor’s Note: Radical Mentoring is an organization we strongly support. With core principles that encourage men to mentor younger men 2 seasons behind them, Radical Mentoring has seen tremendous success. Here is an excerpt pulled off their website.

Radical Mentoring, A Radical Plan to Change the World, a Few Men at a Time

Taken from Radical Mentoring’s Website

Radical Mentoring is produced by the Next Generation Mentoring Foundation.

After years of mentoring younger men individually, Regi Campbell heard a speaker say “More time, with fewer people, equals greater kingdom impact”, and he set off to mentor a group of men for the first time. Since 2001, he’s mentored nearly 100 men personally in what he calls “Radical Mentoring Groups” and his model for mentoring has been embraced by many other Christian leaders.

Along the way, Regi came to see that the success of Radical Mentoring was derived from the fact that he was simply doing what Jesus did:

He mentored in a small group context.
He handpicked the men.
He invested in them for a defined period of time.
He mentored them for Kingdom purposes.
He served them and modeled selflessness.
He made and received a mutual commitment from His mentees.
He expected multiplication, not addition, and a commitment to pay it forward.
He steeped the process and the men in prayer.
He taught them within the context of life, along the way.
He modeled a God-centric life allowing them to see how He applied His faith in every aspect of life.
He lived, taught and interpreted Scripture throughout their time together.

Campbell has written a book that dives deeper into the application of these practices and mentoring small groups. Mentor Like Jesus was released by B&H Publishers in May 2009 and can be purchased here.

In 2007, High Tech Ministries embraced the model. Four mentors led 30 next-generation leaders through the Radical Mentoring process and each of the men involved realized incredible results. The process was proven.

From 2007–2011, over 1,100 men and, subsequently, their wives and children have been impacted by individual mentors throughout the United States, Canada and the U.K. who have invested in them through a Radical Mentoring Group.

In 2011, Radical Mentoring has extended it’s borders to all of the English-speaking world by providing its content in an electronic format that allows the mentor more flexibility to customize a “track” that is meaningful to him and his life experiences.

The Radical Mentoring team includes:

Regi Campbell: Founder and Chairman
Chris Hornsby: Executive Director
John Richie: Convene Chair; NGM Foundation Board Member
Dennis Latimer: Exec. VP – Web Industries, Inc.; NGM Foundation Board Member
Dave Katz: Sr. VP, Midwest, Coca-Cola Refreshments; NGM Foundation Board Member
Ross Campbell, MD: President, Georgia Skin Cancer & Aesthetic Dermatology; NGM Foundation Board Member

Follow Regi Cambell on Twitter: http://twitter.com/radicalmentor
Like Radical Mentoring Now on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/RadicalMentoring

Stephen Jaques: The allegiance of your heart

Posted by in Brotherhood,Faith | October 15, 2012

Editor’s Note: Stephen has really written a terrific post for us. We asked him what advice he would give himself as a freshman in highschool and he was quick to respond with a thoughtful reflection on how he arrived at the point he is today. Stephen is a man of God but is quick to point out that in highschool he was a boy who had all the answers but was blinded by his own idols.

High school was fun. I enjoyed it but I wouldn’t say that it was the time of my life. There was a series of events that rocked my world to its core. I would later find that these things were God-ordained, and I thank Him for it now; but as the story unfolds, we will see that it was avoidable. I wish I could go back to my freshman self and teach him this all-important lesson.

For a lot of high schoolers, especially where I’m from, life is comfortable. Most of us have a short list of major responsibilities like schoolwork or sports but after that we are free to enjoy life. Most of us do not experience depression, suicidal thoughts, and other, “big ticket,” problems. But we all experience the, “routine,” problems of life, rejection, breakups, and failure on a variety of levels. I used to think God wasn’t part of these problems. He was there like the insurance company when your “house burns down,” but not when you have a “flat tire” in life. That was wrong. God, I found, often uses the routine ups and downs of life to teach us important lessons and he cares about the big things in your life as well as the small stuff.  

So here’s where the story begins. I’m going into my senior year of high school expecting the greatest year of my life to date because that was how it had been sold to me. I had great expectations! But underneath these expectations were idols…

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Rick Halkyard: I can’t save you

Posted by in Faith | October 8, 2012

Thinking of one piece of advice that I would’ve given to myself my freshmen year of high school is something I don’t have to consider greatly. The answer for me, specifically, is obvious. I would’ve sat me down and very bluntly told myself that I do not have the ability to save someone. Nor do I have the ability to be someone else’s foundation or source of security.

I befriended a girl my sophomore year of high school and soon afterwards, we entered into a relationship. I didn’t realize this at the time, but my effort to maintain and build that relationship was completely selfish. I made that relationship my everything – it was my salvation. She gave me purpose and for the first time, I was happy.

However, whenever that relationship was harmed, whether it was by me or someone else, it shook my foundation and I felt that everything around me was crumbling. After a worrisome and exhausting year of doing that, I got a call from her one night to come over to her house and that was all she said. On the ten minute drive from my house to hers I kept thinking that she was going to break it off. When I got to her house, I found out that that wasn’t the case. She told me over the course of three hours and streams of tears that she had an eating disorder call CE (Compulsive Eater). This began a difficult three years of regret…

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Nate Reed: Who will free the captives?

Posted by in Faith | September 24, 2012

If I could pick just one situation from my list of many that I have learned from in my life, I would pick the last time I was in jail. I had been running from God for awhile up to this point; but because he is who he is, he kept pursuing me. Never giving up, he showed his face to me while in that dark place.

The thing I realized was that God had to strip everything away from me so that he could show me who was really in charge. I really had no control over my life at that point. I would just go along with what everyone else was doing even if I didn’t agree with it, just so that I could fit in. That obviously didn’t work out very well. By the time i was 20 I had been arrested 5 times and really had nothing of significance to show for my life. I had ruined my relationship with my family and friends, and wanted nothing to do with God. I didn’t feel that i deserved his grace.

But as it turns out, that was a lie that the devil was using to try and keep me from having a relationship with God. After that realization, I sat in a jail cell for a couple of days before I could finally go to a church service. The most significant thing about that service was that I was able to get my hands on a bible, which I was able to take back to my cell with me. At that point, I felt like this was something that was just between me and Christ. I didn’t feel like I had to live up to any certain “standard.” (And if you have been around enough christians you know exactly what I’m talking about).

I felt a sense of freedom, which is funny now, because my body was not free. I was being told when to wake up, when I could shower, and when I could eat; but for the first time, my soul felt a sense of freedom I had never felt in my life.

Nate Reed